Nov. 14, 2023

When Kids Are Down On Themselves

When Kids Are Down On Themselves

Why do our kids engage in negative self-talk? Where is it coming from? Are we supposed to ignore it or push back? Here are the reasons kids can get down on themselves, how concerned we should get, plus the most productive ways of responding.

When we hear our kids say something negative about themselves, sometimes we freak out a little. Where did they hear this? Where is this coming from? Who is messing with my baby? !

Most often, if a kid calls herself “stupid” because she’s frustrated with homework, she might just be venting. Or joking. She might be showing us that she has a little rigidity around perfection. 

But when negative self-talk is insistent, consistent, and persistent, it can also be a sign of stress or anxiety. 

In this episode we discuss how to better understand our kids’ negative self-talk, and the most productive ways of responding. There’s a bonus: turns out most of those strategies also work for our own “No, are you kidding? I look horrible, the pandemic has aged me a decade!” moments.

Here are links to two resources we discuss in this episode: 

Andrew M.I. Lee for Understood: Why Kids Say Negative Things About Themselves 

https://www.understood.org/articles/en/child-negative-self-talk

@transformingtoddlerhood on Instagram


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